Sunday, June 9, 2019
What is it about Mazzy? I mean she can be so difficult and then turn around and be there when you need her. Well, something like that.
I mean we've been pretty tight..as of late. You know, she needs someone. And..I don't know those other people.
Look, people may tell you..you make the best friends in high school. But..I dunno. Not really. I mean, I never did. I didn't know her then.
Even now, she gets hung up on our age difference. So what if she's almost five years older. It's just a number, you know.
It's not like we argue about it. She just gets a little testy, sometimes.
And she'll talk about Jay, but he might as well be a figment of her imagination. The dude is not even around.
I mean, we are more than friends. She means the world to me. I really wouldn't be here if I didn't mean it. But Mazzy on the other hand.
She's got her pride. She can be a fool.
All I can do is wait. Hope someday she'll want us to be more than just spending weekends together. I might as well move in. I'm always there.
Posted by ellie at 12:46 PM
Monday, May 27, 2019
You know, I never actually knew his real name. And we did a lot of shit together back in high school. I mean, I'd never say he was my official boyfriend. It's not like he took me to prom or anything. And I know he went to prom. He had dates, you know. Like two or three. God knows, what he was thinking then.
Guess it was ambition. That was when I just knew I'd get into art school. And I could have, but that takes a lot of money and well, my parents said no. And I was pretty much a bitch then and only made things worse. I didn't even make it through one semester at metro.
So yeah, I'm kind of a sad story. I blamed Jay for a lot shit that I should have taken some responsibility for. It's not that I hate him, but then I don't like him much either. Especially, when he decided to go to California. All on his own.
Guess, I think about him from time to time, but I dunno if I even want to see him again. Although, I have not found a soul to change my life...since then.
Posted by ellie at 11:54 AM